Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Bitch Stole My Fish

The look on this kid's face is classic, I literally laughed out loud at it!


G.W. Speach Checklist

My Spech Cheklist
By G.W.

Mor Terrer
Mor 911
Stay The Course

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

The Tech Support Caller Warning System

Low Stupidity ConditionSignifies a caller offers little or no risk of causing the tech a cranial aneurysm. This is usually a calller who understand that most technical "secrets" are cleverly concealed in the mysterious things called "manuals." Recommendation: Cherish these ones.
Suspicious Stupiditity Condition Signifies a caller who is suspected of weapons-grade stupidity, without any real evidence. Recommendation: Send "inspectors."
Elevated Stupidity Condition Indicates a significant risk of stroke in the tech cause by a caller who insist that "there is no 'any key' on the keyboard" and that "there's no way I can click on 'you computer' from over here."Recommendation: Slow Breating exercisiese and a good punching bag.
High Stupidity Condition Indicates a high risk of an apoplectic fit. callers insist that their operating system is "netscape," their web browser is by "Logitech" and the specific application that blew up on them is "Microsoft." (Heh) Recommendation: Join a Zen Monastery
Severe Stupidity Condition Indicates the highest risk possible. Adrenaline overload and renal failure caused by callers who angrily state that they have a degree and are in fact very clever, and that the tech must "hop to it and fix things." When asked to "open a window" they do in fact get up and open a window. Alas. Recommendation: a large bludgeoning instrument. For you or them, it's really your choice.

From our friends over at User Friendly

Friday, January 13, 2006

Satellite Picture of Kennedy Space Center

I believe this is from Google Earth, but I'm not sure...either way, this is the Kennedy Space Center down here in Florida. You can see the crawler (upper left on the roadway) that transports the fully assembled shuttle from the hanger bay to the launch pad. I've been to the space center a couple times, and while it's damn interesting, it can be boring, because the place is simply so damn huge, and much of it is offlimits now. (thank you terrorists!)

Mountain go BOOM.

With recent news of volcano blowing up, I figured a kickass picture one one cooking off was in order.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Iraqi Sandstorm

Found this out in the vast wasteland that is the internet. I remember seeing this picture back when it was new, and there was a whole series of them. This is some serious stormage, but I wonder how it compares to a hurricane? It somewhat reminds me of the opening scenes of "ID4: Independence Day" where the alien spaceships are coming down, and the clouds are billowing towards the earth. On here, it's mother nature that's rolling across the desert, and she can be much more of a bitch then any spaceheaded aliens.

Look at that, my first double post! Looks like I had this up before.

Redneck Pacifier

So, I've heard it all before, kids should not be an extention of their parent's ill humor towards humanity, but this is simply too good to pass by. If/when I have kids, they will surely have pacifiers much like this one.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Go Break Yo Self Fool!

"If it's hard to grasp
why disable people
need this space,
Go and break
your fucking spine."

Sounds painful, but makes a good point. My office has a window overlooking the parking lot, and the handicapped spot is right by me. You have no idea how many times I see rather spry looking people jumping out of their cars.

Love you long time!

"I will not love
you long time"

A rather disgruntled lookin gal here, eh? The t-shirt is a response to the classic "Full Metal Jacket" line.

Would you put a T-Rex on YOUR ark?

Say that you though god was going to blow up / flood the world, and he had chosen you to go out and take up a pair of each animal. Would you take a T-Rex? or how about a pair of Raptors? I know everyone thinks they're all cuddly and shit, but lemme tell you, after the honey moon, life gets rough.

No Means.....whoa!

"No means
Eat me out first."

Yeah baby!

Monday, January 09, 2006

What would MacGyver do

Just what would MacGyver do? Make some kind of cool shit outta a toilet paper roll and some bailing wire! That's what!

Serenity / Firefly Movie Posters

I simply cannot belive that I haven't purchased this movie yet. /sigh being poor does suck sometimes, yeah?

Super Puppy!

This is somewhat funny, because I have a dog that has the same kind of floppy ears. I think it would be hilarious if I threw him around and his ears did this, but unfortunately, he weighs in at 50 pounds. Not exactly a small sack of potatoes to be tossed about!

Tom was delicious

Ok, we've all seen the "missing cat/dog/gerbil" contact me if you find him /sob/sob/sob posters on telephone poles and various walls and alleyways. This is rather funny though: over one of these missing posters for a cat named "Tom", someone's put a sheet of paper that says "your cat was delicious" and "tom was delicous". This is rofl funny, yes?

You do not have permission to access to /girl on this server

A parody on 404 error :
You don't have permission to access /girl on this server."

Thursday, January 05, 2006

What would Cthulhu Do?

Piercings are cool, and so are the borg...

So, you put together a hot bald chick, some piercings, some borg items, some silver make up...and you have some kind of HR Giger / Playboy spread. Now THAT would be hot.

In car / In window A/C!

Let's talk about ghetto. Not only is that a window A/C unit in this dude's car, but that's a damn generator strapped to the truck.

Jesus! WTF ->

There are christmas lights on the 5th story of a building (dorm perhaps) that spell out "Jesus". Might be a religous celebration, or maybe an exclamation of dorm pleasures. Either way, the people on the 2nd floor are somewhat mystified, so they've put up their own christmas lights that spell out "WTF".

pure comedy genius!

Free Cat!

Another oldie but goodie :

Free cat!

Nudist Beach


Fat chicks prohibited beyond this point

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Mars panorama

From a mars panorama pictures website. Pretty cool stuff, I just made one of them my desktop.

And on a side note, the author of that site is on crack. He's boasting about firefox (only the best broswer in the known world) and crackin on IE, while at the same time, displaying one of the worse choices in webpage colors and fonts I've seen in a long while. I'm surprised he didn't use the blink tag anywhere.

Windows Sex Vs Mac Sex

Windows Users like to look at sex on their computers.

Mac Users Like to have sex with their computers.


Sure! You can have my mp3s...

"Sure! You can have my mp3s...

...after you pry 'em from
my cold, dead hands"

Which is how I feel too! Of course, most 'legal' MP3s these days come with some wonderfully craptastic features like DRM (itunes? why would I want something that won't let me play my music where ever I want to?) Which is why I use to upload all my stuff, listen to it where ever I want, and not worry about losing 10 grand in music investments. not that I've paid for much of my music mind you...commonbits/creative commons is a godsend, yes?

Buddy Jesus

It's the buddy jesus from the brain farts over at ViewAskew



Looks so good you won't notice the smell.

"If it's colorful,
We're trying to sell it to you!"

Punch to the face...over TCP/IP

Dear Lord,
Please grant me the
ability to punch
people in the face
over standard TCP/IP.

Unattended Children

"Unattended Children will be given an espresso and a free puppy"

It took me a bit to figure this one out, then I remembered my grandparents always giving me coffee with 4 scoops of sugar right before my parents picked me up...guess it was revenge!